At work, distressed over whole pumpkin. And the need for some kickin boots. When will I find time to devote to the important things in life??

This Halloween week, I've been so busy that my unmade jack o'lantern sits in my kitchen, unmolested and completely not scary. I had time last night, but not the energy to butcher the squash. Now, I have to rush my creation (bwa-ha-ha!!). Am completely unhappy.

Also, I figured out what I have been missing lately--a nice pair of boots to drop kick my funk (and a couple of idiots along the way). And, they would add that finishing touch to my angel of death outfit. Need boots now.

I've been having a lot of fits of hysterical laughter lately....

New one--you can get a whole set of gold teeth here.

HAHAHAHAHHA!!!

Cannot stop laughing about most recent email from sketchy man. As a joke, my friend wrote up a blunt and true match.com personal ad for me. Have gotten hits galore. This one being the best of the lot, from my admirer, also known as "striperjunkie":

Subject: hmmmmm!

thats a freaky write up girl!!!

rocky

As his profile says, it's all about the fishing.

OK, complete reversal of my bad habits at once is a big bite of difficult. So, I will continue to work on my impatience, anger, and anxiety, and will try to be more laid back, as I have been trying for years (as those of you can attest that I'm better than I used to be). I will sleep because that's not really too hard. I will try and get out more, which will help with the hermit-ness. However, I will postpone my efforts on ending my justifications in life (my psych degree just won't let me), catering to my obsessive nature, and hating people in general. It's good to have something to rely on in life, and I so rely on my compulsions and disappointment in people, it makes for more pleasant surprises.

I've decided that today will the start of a new life. I will no longer continue my Type A symptoms (impatience, anger, anxiety), cater to my obsessive nature, feed my depression through too much Sims (my Sims guy went up in flames, I mourned) and too little sleep, be the hermit I've been, try and discern patterns in life to make justification easier, and hate people in general. I will try to meet new people, attempt those things I've always wanted to do and stick with them, be more laid back, and be more communicative.

Oh, this is going to be hard.

It isn't easy being blue.

I have a co-worker from Kentucky (he's not blue), but he describes such strange sub-species of Kentuckians....it's like Lord of the Rings there. We're just waiting to hear about the dwarfs who have lived generations in the mines.

Am very glad that excessive Paulage is annoying. Dumb ass.

Had a strange dream last night of cleaning out fridge with my best friend, then going on a driveby and zoning out so badly that I ended up in Boston at 7am, gliding into downtown on fumes. While searching for a gas station that wasn't getting held up, I came across a group of guys, early 20s, skateboarding around this really complex dirt track they had built at a demolition site. Decided to forgo finding fuel and join the guys. Had the time of my life.

Hmm, my own obvious interpretation:

I absolutely hate cleaning out the fridge. It's a metaphor for opening up/fighting with my friend about my jealousies and paranoia. To escape this yucky experience, I go on my typical drive and end up in Boston--the place I always wish to go when I really want to get away. However, I realize that this is not practical and by the time I get there, my escapism urge and anger will have gone away. Now I'm stuck in scary repercussions for escaping instead of confronting my problems, I desperately try to find a way to get back on track with life. Instead, I get distracted by young punks and decide to just wing it and have fun. Hmmm, my mind is made up.

Any other interpretations?

Am very bitter about life. Watched Madame Butterfly and left the opera crushingly sad and internally bitching out Pinkerton as the crap ass motherfucker that he is. Saw him as the paradigm of the men in my life recently....self-centered and cowardly. Let's just let her figure it out herself...oh sad stupid girl for believing it will all work out in the end.

Will release anger through song....just finished "men...and their sales" and moving onward to "midget manwhores (the oompa loompa song)"

Yes, good plan.

Oh the rollercoaster of life....

I take that last blog back. My mourning period is not over, and the disrespect that midget manwhores give to me is less than appealing, but I can't stop obsessing!

I will no longer be fooled by little old man-boys. They are unworthy of my attention.

Blind date with idiotic midget. Things do not look good.